Sexy Habits You Won’t Want to Break

By Dr. Jess Relationships sexy habits

Want to add some spark into your relationship? Interested in creating a better connection, taking part in better sex, and fostering intimacy? All of those goals start with sexy habits. The following list of sexy habits and practices are ones you won’t want to break.

Cop a feel

Don’t save the affection for the bedroom. Cop an unexpected feel throughout the day while your partner is driving, doing the dishes or watching the news. A light brush of the thigh, squeeze of the butt or fondling through the pants is a fun sexual activity and gets the foreplay started well in advance to let desire build throughout the day.

Send a Voice Note

Sexting can be fun, but the sound of your voice can send shivers down their spine. Your voice changes according to your mood and even your desire levels. So if you find yourself in the mood for a sexual activity or even aroused in your lover’s absence, record a few words and hit send. Your note can be rather mild (e.g. “I’m thinking of you.” “I wish you were here.” “Just the thought of your ______ got me all hot and bothered.” “Can’t wait until tonight.”) or more intense (e.g. “I’m rock hard and waiting for you.” “I want to taste you.” “I want you and I’m going to teach you a lesson tonight.”)

Kiss as soon as you get home

Don’t pet the dog, open the mail or pass GO until you’ve planted one on your lover’s lips and swapped a bit of saliva (it contains testosterone). Kissing sets off a flurry of chemical reactions throughout the body and ensures that sex is in the air the moment you walk in the door.

Meet at parties instead of going together

There is something sexy about connecting when you’re out in public and meeting at events can recall feelings of your early days of dating. For this sexy practice, work the room separately, lock eyes, build anticipation and let a little role play unfold when you meet.

Take sixty seconds

Do a sixty-second favor every day to remind your lover that you’re thinking of them. These little favors might include delivering a coffee in bed, pouring a glass of wine, lighting candles around the bath/shower, shining a pair of shoes, picking up a favorite snack, ordering takeout, giving a hand massage, putting gas in the car or warming up their towel in the dryer while they shower. Though these favors aren’t sexual in nature, they’ll inevitably lead to more sex as they further entrench your intimate connection. And if you can’t find sixty seconds in the day, you’re not trying hard enough. No excuses.

Use a code word

Call your partner at work and use a code word to tease one another about what’s to come when you get home.


Sexy habits can start with your phone. Technology need not detract from your relationship and sexting is just one example of how our smartphones can enhance sex. Sneak away to your office bathroom and snap a pic of your stomach, chest, buttocks, lips or any other body part you love and send it to your lover in the middle of the day. If you don’t want to send pics, write a text detailing a hot fantasy…

Give genuine compliments

Couples who compliment one another have more sex, and both giving and receiving compliments can boost your sexual self-esteem. So dole them out generously and accept them with graciousness. If you want to be inspired to have better sex, compliment your lover’s body, cooking skills, commitment to kindness, sense of humor, and anything else that draws you in.

Be a flirt

Flirting is essential to keeping the sexual spark alive, as it draws sex out of the bedroom and into our daily routines to eroticize the relationship. By teasing and tantalizing your lover in non-sexual situations, you prime their mind and body for sex at a later time.

Take a fantasy break

Your workday may be stressful, but see if you can take one minute every day (put an alert in your phone calendar) to think about something sexual. This simple process can help to retrain your mind and body to make sex a part of your daily routine.

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