7 Valentine’s Day Alternatives

By Dr. Jess Relationships valentines day alternatives

Valentine’s Day Alternatives

The season of love is upon us and in the upcoming days, couples will start scrambling to make plans, send flowers, buy chocolates and select the perfect gift for their loved ones.

Even as the number of people who celebrate Valentine’s Day continues to decline, spending continues to increase alongside the pressure to make the 14th a day to remember.

But what if you skipped Valentine’s Day altogether in favor of celebrating your relationship all year long? What if you were to invest a few minutes each day in ensuring that your partner feels appreciated and loved instead of worrying about grand gestures once or twice a year? What if you were to prioritize affection, expressions of love and sexual connection each and every week?

Chances are, the pressure would decrease and feelings of connection would increase. So, as Valentine’s Day approaches, I’d like you to think about how you really want to celebrate your love and consider some Valentine’s Day alternatives:

Spread the love to the singles.

Platonic love can be just as meaningful and fulfilling as romantic love, so let Valentine’s Day motivate you to reach out to a friend, visit an elderly neighbor or spread the love to your siblings or cousins. While recent research suggests that single folks are just as happy as those in relationships, being single on Valentine’s Day can be a source of distress thanks to a culture that pressures you to couple up.

spread the love on valentines day

Think back to your grade school V-Day parties that involved making cards for all of your friends or classmates and consider doing the same for loved ones to whom you may not regularly express your affection.

Have a threesome (date).

Invite a single friend you both like along for the ride! As you spread the love and positive vibes, your relationship will thrive. You might also find that hanging out with singles creates a sense of adventure and offers a reminder that growing individually is just as important as growing as a team.

have a threesome valentines day


The benefits of giving back are well documented: folks who volunteer feel happier, more fulfilled and more confident. They’re also perceived as more attractive. Whether you’ve been together for years or you’re in a casual new romance, you’ll be creating a good habit and expanding your social network to include like-minded folks.

Get in touch with your first Valentine.

If you’re lucky enough to have your parents (or parental figures) in your life, Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to reach out. They were likely your very first Valentine, so consider sending them a card, carving out time for a call or setting a date to have a non-romantic candlelight dinner.

celebrate valentines day early or late

Celebrate a few days early (or late).

Rather than fighting for reservations, plan ahead and celebrate with a long lunch, breakfast in bed or a trip to your local sex-positive shop the weekend before (or after) Valentine’s Day. Couples who don’t get hung up on specific dates tend to find that the pressure subsides and they’re able to be present and really enjoy one another’s company.

Get it on.

Rather than worrying about the perfect gift or an elaborately planned date, why not set your alarm 15 minutes early and wake your lover up with some sensual kisses and seductive strokes to lead to a morning quickie. If you’re not used to initiating sex, or you’re intimidated by the morning light, use a tie as a blindfold and be sure to keep your favorite lube on hand so that each caress becomes even more tantalizing and your physical response is heightened.


morning sex valentines day

Morning sex not only sets the tone for a happy, harmonious day, but it has the potential to boost your mood and cultivate a connection that can last for days to come!

If you’re single on Valentines’ Day…

Enjoy! There is no pressure to celebrate. But if you want to mark the occasion, consider making plans for a happy couple you admire! Happiness, healthy relationships and self-esteem are contagious, so invite a couple out for afternoon tea, dinner or drinks. Many coupes find planning for V-Day stressful, so you’ll likely be lightening their load by taking the initiative to make plans.

What are your favorite Valentine’s Day alternatives? Share with us on Twitter @ASTROGLIDE